Thursday, January 20, 2011

In desperate need

We just had a very depressing staff meeting about the upcoming budget and plans for next year. Basically, as usual, we don't have enough money. So the plan is to start teaching 6 out of 7 classes. That really got me worried, because I am only part time, and if other teachers pick up an extra class, all my classes will be picked up by someone else. In short, I will have no job. I talked to my assitant principal about it first, and she very kindly said that she did not want to lie to me and I should be worried. She told me that I really needed to start looking at my options. I'm not really sure what that means other than looking at other campuses, which is devastating to think about because I have never worked anywhere but AMS and I love it here. So, I came back to my room and called John and cried. Then my principal came in and pretty much said that he didn't really know what was going to happen, but he would keep me informed. I think that is about all anyone can promise right now. But no one is going to know anything for awhile. So for now I live in limbo. John did say that we would make it work if I wanted to stay home, which doesn't sound too bad, but as hard as my job has been this year, I really like working. I adore my mornings at home with Zoey, but it is a nice break in my day to go to work. I will go where God wants me to go and I will do what he wants me to do, and I just keep having to tell myself that He will guide no matter if I like the outcome or not. But prayer for peace and patience would be nice.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Shameful return

I'm a little out of touch with everything right now. And, as much as I would like that to come to an end, I just don't see it happening. Sheesh. I wish I could just get it together. Maybe I need some 5 Hour Energy or something. A nice, dreamless sleep would help I think. So would some hormones that aren't so (literally) out of whack. And it would be nice if I could get ahold of the doctor I need to see to get said hormones back in whack. But alas, I can't. I could really go on a rant about that, but I will refrain. Even though I really want to. It's been awhile since I have made a list of things I am thankful for, and I have so many right now, especially with the holidays behind me  having lived through the holidays having just experienced the holidays. Our holiday was a bit busy, but it was great. I was really wonderful having John home with me and Zoey the first week and most of the second week. And it was great being able to be with Zoey. It made me want to stay home, but I just know that I am not cut out for it. I know that some mom are really great and have all kinds on activities and such for their kids, but Zoey and I just hang out and shop. We spend a lot of time in our pj's. So here is a little post holiday list:
82. A little girl who is bursting with personality (sometimes too much; boy can that girl be sassy).
83. A little girl who loves her family passionately. She was in HEAVEN during Christmas when all the Simpsons were together. She was the center of everyone's attention. And she decided that her Uncle Justin was her best friend, and very vehemently stuck to that-to the chagrin of her Aunt Christie.
84. Actually getting Zoey gifts that she loves. Sometimes it is a hit or miss with the things that girl is going to cling to, but the Legos and kitchen were a huge success.
85. A trip to the Bryant farm on the way home. Some friends of ours have family that lives in Kosse, which is on our way home from Waco, and one year in desperation to feed Zoey, we asked if we could stop by, and it has become a tradition. They welcome us like family and don't even mind if we interrupt their real family time (this year we arrived when some extended family was opening presents-super embarrassing). We get to ride in the back of the truck and feed the cows. Zoey loved that. She was much more brave than I gave her credit for. She usually is. I need to stop being so surprised. She is totally her Daddy's girl.
86. A great weekend away with my two favorite girls. I love our tradition of having a mother/ daughter shopping trip. It combines all the things I love-food, shopping and my mom and sister.
87. That little boy that keeps growing away in my sister's tummy. Zoey and I have been really talking about it lately, and somehow she knows a scary amount of details about childbirth. Maybe they really can remember...
88. A third birthday party that is already in the works even though it is months away. I don't care. I am excited.
89. Being able to sing with the praise team again last Sunday. I have had three weeks away due to Christmas and stupid family worship (John is the sound guys, so if I was on stage singing, Zoey would be running wild with no one to stop her). Practice last week was great. I have missed my team.
90. Hot dogs. I am thankful for hot dogs. I really love them. I ate 2 last night for dinner, and I had 2 more for lunch today. I could probably eat them for dinner again. They are so good.